Comic Book Foldees

I couldn't find much info on the subject of Comic Book Foldees other than Topps produced them as gumpack novelties in the mid 1960's. I have a vague memory of having a few but that might just be some other product I'm thinking of.

Here are a few I found while netting. Looking on ebay, some of these sets go for big bucks!

From the package cover it looks like you could shuffle characters, fodl them to overlap portions of the booklet with amusing results. Superman in a dress...what is funnier than that?

However in making it possible to create a Vampire-Lincon, Grant-Pig and Washington-Dictator I'm prompted to wonder about the politics of the designers. After all, it was the 1960's...

Ultimate Groin Injury Saturday - Prevention PSA

The french HIV awareness site AIDeS produced these PSA posters for an AIDS prevention campaign. The posters display a guy and a girl in various stages of copulating with a huge scorpion and a giant spider.

The text on the posters reads as: Sans préservatif, c'est le sida avec que vous faites l'amour. Protéger-vous

Translation: Without a condom it's the AIDS you're making love to. Protect yourself.

These are definately public service awareness ads that grab your attention. They are brutally blunt in their message about personal safety and responsibility. In a country that does not allow schools or doctors to teach safety in some cases (especially where federal funds are concerned) imagine just how long these would last in the USA before the hypocritical & knee-jerk outcry got them pulled from circulation.

Go here for the larger photos.

ACE Books vs. The Question

I'm a big fan of the art that appears in the genres of pulps, noir, SF and Horror. While searching for unique art, one day I came across this cover...

All I could think of when I saw it was this guy...

ACE books published Stamped For Death in 1958, almost a decade before Steve Ditko first had the Question appear in Charlton's Blue Beetle #1. I won't say Ditko was influenced by the ACE book cover, that would be ridiculous. The inspiration for the Question could be anything from pulling a good idea out of thin air, to Ditko deciding he doesn't feel like drawing his usual twisted into death rictus, pop-eyed expressions on characters for 23 pages a month.
Faceless characters in fiction are an old and popular idea...

Dick Tracy squared off against The Blank in the 1930's...

This guy appeared in Idiot Boy Monthly...
God, according to Jack Chick, as he appeared 5000 years ago...

Some Guy doing the perp-walk (It's fiction because he's being framed by The Man)...

Mr. Potatohead, from 1952...

Don't forget this crew member from 1960's era Star Trek!

Supergirl is no fool

"...and that isn't an armed soldier guarding prisoners, either. It's an escort helping guests. Purely ceremonial, I assure you."

A few minutes later, Supergirl took off her wig and kicked their lying, green Ditko-esque asses back to their own world.

Wow, were they arrogant! If you are an evil alien overlord attacking the DCU Earth, it might be better if you give your torture machines some creative labeling. 'Brain Drain', 'Organ Crusher' and 'Skin-Flense-O-Matic' might just clue in the superheroes that you are not on the level about sharing advanced knowledge with no thought of personal gain.

Superman totally ripped-off II Kings 2:11

Comicdom has forgotten that when baby Kal-El was originally enroute to Earth he took a detour through a space warp to another universe, where the only power he had was Super-Poor Fashion Sense.

In this world Kal-El (named Sonn by his adoptive parents) radiated an energy that made people smart. From the effects of the radiation the tribes evolved from a cavemen-level existence to a futuristic Krypton-like society in about 8 years. In fact they got so smart that they decided to hunt Sonn down and kill him, thanks to the machinations of his jealous sister, who was earlier zapped by a monster, who turned people evil by looking at them.

Right. Because people are inherently good.

She was always bad news, but getting spot-lighted by the evil-inducing ray kind of sealed the deal.

Eventually, his own child, Vol, located Sonn as he was aged and near death. Regressed to the age of an infant, Sonn was sent back into space to complete his journey to Earth.

That's how I felt when I read this

The ironic twist was that when the baby was sent back into space it removed the influence of the evolution radiation, so the people regressed quickly. Now instead of being evil and smart they are evil and stupid. I can't decide which is more dangerous. But I doubt these people lived until the Crisis erased them. A futuristic city populated by ape-like humans probably blew itself up the first time one of them noticed a shiny button at the fusion plant and pressed it.

DC continues the Superman-As-Messiah theme

Sometimes, I gotta wonder why I like the Silver Age so much, but not all issues can be winners. Mercifully, much like when Superman discovered his parents floating in space in suspended animation, and having to leave them there because of a plague they carried, this story was never referenced again.

Occasionally you have to replace the lamb

Sylvia Browne and others conspire to 'explain' what happens to pets when they die. This book is careful not to refer to the other side as 'heaven', probably because of the inevitable backlash from morons, partly because it isn't good business to exclude other religions by being heaven-centric.

Just so you know, the 'Other Side' has Unicorns and warm fluffy snow to play in and architecture from Europe dotting the landscape. Traditional predator and prey relationships are no more and they get along famously. There are no icky bugs over there. Or skunks. I guess as long as you were cute when you lived, or fiction-based, you get to go there. No ugly animals need apply.

Any parent that exposes their kid to this book should be charged with child abuse and be declared an unfit guardian. Before they get their kids back they must be sent back to a school that is not in the vicinity of Kansas with the hope that the second time around they will learn something before they graduate again.

It's bad enough it is in the children's section of the library, but at least it is appropriately assigned to the 100 class (Philosophy & Psychology) of the Dewey Decimal system. Fortunately this book is not in the Science (500), Religion (200) or non-fiction section of the library. If it was, I'd start a campaign to get it reclassified and sitting on the shelf next to the Hobbits.

Hey, know what happens when a pet dies? It's dead.

For more about the author go here.

8-12-05, Update: Words fail me...

Tags: Skeptic

Ron Frenz: The Perfect Storm

So a few weeks ago I'm at one of those oil-change franchise shops over in the Glen Burnie area getting my car serviced. I got to say that was one of the best oil-change places I have ever patronized. Not because of the decor, which has the typical uninspired funtionality, It was because I didn't get a hard-sell.

I went in, told them I wanted an oil-change and they did it efficiently and quickly. The staff didn't try to tell me I needed extra equipment, transmission flushing or wiper blades. I can't tell you how much I appreciated that and they will get my business again.

Without exception while getting service in San Diego, I or my wife always got the scare tactics from the crews. On one particular visit I changed the car's air-filter in my driveway just before heading down to the service center, and they tried to tell me I needed a new one for $25 or it could damage my car. Apparently they didn't notice the brand-new empty air-filter packaging I left on the front seat of my car when I came in. On another visit to a different garage one of the staff hurries over, dip-stick in hand and shows my wife the 'dirty and dangerous' state of the transmission fluid. Now this is just predatory and it really got me annoyed. I told the guy we declined the additonal $55 service but he ignored me and kept talking to my wife, who was starting to get freaked about the 'possible $5000 repair in the future if YOU DON'T ACT NOW'. So then I had to get firm. Go ahead and do your 13-point inspection, I appreciate it and will listen to you if you find any problems and address them...but don't try to scam us.

So while waiting for the service to get done this time I was flipping through the selection of magazines and came across this single-page feature in the May 2005 issue of Outdoor Life.

Some of you may be familiar with Ron Frenz' work. He did the art chores on Marvel's Ka-Zar, Spider-Man, Spider-Girl, Thunderstrike, Thor & DC's Superman, among other books. I always appreciate seeing a comic artist work in other than the traditional outlets fans may be familiar with, like Joe Kubert's (and probably students and sons) military illustrations for PS Magazine.

Tags: Ron Frenz Comic Book Art

Bad Advertising: Join the Mutant Navy

I originally found this Navy recruitment brochure way back around 1987 while at a Doctor's office. Right away I noticed something unusual about it that set my Cynic-sense tingling. I have retained a precious copy because of the ridiculous and obviously intentional manipulation of the photo of the sailor.

A few years ago when I worked for a security guard company some of my duties (among many) were to write Standard Operating Procedure manuals and train the new hires to be ready to go out into the field and work.

One universal problem that was identified in regards to the security guard work ethic was the failure to follow through in almost any task. I can't tell you how many reports of suspicious persons around cars, reports of unlocked doors or missed trends could be identified as being ignored or not investigated. Now, I'm the type of person who believes that if you agree to do a job you do it to the best of your ability and not slack off because the wage is not what you think it should be. Truthfully, I've seen guards work at a facility where the post pays many times the average rate, comes with benefits, and they still pull the same stunts to get out of actually doing anything resembling work.

As Martin Luther King Jr., said: "If a man is called to be a street sweeper, he should sweep streets even as Michelangelo painted or Beethoven composed music or Shakespeare wrote poetry. He should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say: 'Here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.' "

Wise words. Do your job, do it well. Hopefully you'll want to improve your lot and work towards promotion or a career that will enable you to reach your personal goals.

One of the lessons I used to teach about following through used the brochure to reinforce that point.

Take a look at the brochure and see if you can spot anything funny about it. I'll wait...


Give up? Okay, take a look at the sailor's hand. What is up with the 10-inch long finger?


Just by looking at the full-size photo one can see what the original intention of the layout of the shoot probably was.

Now, the agency that prepared these recruitment brochures were paid a lot of tax payer money to produce commercials, films, programs, etc., and I demand a quality product for my money. A huge staff of advertising professionals had to work on this flyer. That staff no doubt included specialists in the field who were civilians, from enlisted ranks and officers. If I recall my military administration days correctly, the final product was likely signed off by a committee of higher-ranking officers.

And yet...no one, and I mean no one, bothered to say the mutant finger didn't look right.

It is easy to deduce why the change to the digit was made if you think about it.

It appears that in the original shot that the sailor was pointing at the console while doing his duty protecting the world from Evil Forces (this was 1987, remember). But it's seems as if someone along the path of creativity decided that a pointing finger was too simple and was not nearly dramatic enough to entice anyone considering a military career into the Navy. So, in true military tradition, the facts were manipulated.

By extending the sailor's finger several inches he was no longer merely gesturing...he was now doing EXTREME! BUTTON-PRESSING! ACTION!

Yes, pushing the button that saves America from Communism is totally way more exciting and recruitment-worthy than something as mind-numbingly dull as just pointing at it.

Even in 1987 the art department should have done a better job of editing the piece. I think that the brochure going to press as it did says much about the ability of the military to perform a simple task and the contempt that the military had for its target demographic. They displayed no respect for a person's intelligence. I imagine they thought no one would notice or give it a second thought about what it might mean.

Now the point I tried to impress upon the new-hire security guards was how necessary it was to follow through on everything. A key is missing? Don't shrug, tell someone. A car alarm goes off? Check it out. Be motivated enough to start and then actually take the steps required to finish.

Millions of tax dollars were spent in recruitment advertising. The military specializes in truly heroic levels of oversight on every facet of a project and yet they still managed to put out a half-assed product. It's frustrating to realize they produced it that way on purpose. All someone had to do was speak up at the right time.

FTW

Clark doesn't seem too repulsed as he watches this guy scrog the planet, but being an alien, Superman might think this is perfectly normal behavior for humans.

The story of corporate exploitation and taking advantage of the little guy was a very common theme in the 70's, slowly petering out by the 90's. You don't see those type of plots as much as you used to, but I swear they were in almost every book back then. The big company was evil, the brilliant but under-appreciated ex-employee would take revenge, only to have a hero stop him and expose the under-handed activity of the corporation/shadow agency/rogue cell. The Green Lantern 'relevancy' issues are good examples of that.

Tags: SOTI

Comic Book PSA - Wanted: A Teen-Age Code

"Let's start a move in the student organization...a sort of guide on the right way to behave!"

Dave is Republican to the extreme...

What an amazing perceptual difference from 1958 to 2005. The public expectation for a similar event happening today would probably depict the last few panels showing Dave and his pals returning with held-sideways Glocks and popping caps in everyone. In 1958 we get a good citizenship lesson and a little subtle imagery in the form of that straw poised in front of Sally's mouth.

-from Strange Adventures, January 1958

Tags: Comic Book PSA

Ace the Bat-Hound Better Watch His Ass

Armor, sword & shield? Now that is one serious get-up for a dogcatcher! You'd think a stick with a rope on the end would be sufficient to corral a stray mutt.

He must really enjoy his work...

"LO! Thine dwelling has 14 felines in residence! The laws of the land state thee may house no more than three! Accept this summons, knave! Thou has 15 days to comply with animal regulations! Heed me, insane cat-lover! And now...I RIDE!"

Tags: Silver Age Gil Kane

Comic Book PSA: DC Reader Survey

I've put this 1970 DC reader survey in the PSA category because it's requesting information on race, something that was becoming economically more important to companies as American society matured.

In traditional mainstream American forms of entertainment non-caucasian characters began to have a greater public profile in televison, film and literature. This was due to many external pressures on the industry such as reality, demographics and marketing. These factors prodded the entertainment industry to seek out and work a little harder for the attention of an audience that they previously gave short-shrift to. This growing realization of a source of previously semi-ignored potential income pushed the sometimes sincere, often cynical and exploitative storylines that were common in media of the era. Many shows left the audience at the end of the story with the lesson that the character was "a credit to your gender/race". Condescending and insulting, it may have actually been the best the writers and producers were allowed to do given hesitant sponsors and interfering censors that were still extant from the "bad old days".

As an example of this, in 1968 the first interracial kiss on broadcast television was on the Star Trek episode Plato's Children, between Capt. Kirk and Lt. Uhura. This was considered scandalous for the time and ground-breaking, shattering barriers.


Yet...many people forget that the premise of the episode was that the protagonists had to be forcedto embrace by their cruel telepathic/telekinetic captors. Hardly the passionate smooch it should have been. I would submit that the scene was actually the first forced interracial male/female rape on television, something in my mind that is much more taboo-shattering than a kiss. That characters were not in control of their own bodies may have been the only way the kiss could have been accomplished and made palatable to middle-America.

To the show's credit, both characters displayed anger and humiliation at their abuse. It was gratifying that Nichelle Nichols did not play the role of some space-ingenue, as women in the genre are often expected to do.

This new idea, that America and even the world beyond was actually populated by more than the sterotypical TV family of WASPs, led to the realization by business that the time was right to aggresively pursue additional sources of income.

While by 1970 the civil rights movement was already going strong, a lot of progress was yet to be made. Economics is, wrongly or rightly, only one of the many avenues that leads to greater civil rights and freedom. Oppression of the masses can really get in the way of effective advertising. As economic standards improve, as awareness grows, as niches are exploited, business takes notice. If someone was sure they could profit off the left-handed Easter Island tribe demographic, you can be sure there would be a shoe and soda commercial featuring them prominently. No business stays solvent for very long if they ignore an available group of end-users. Comic book publishers are no exception.

Take a good look at the following 2-page reader survey (clicking on them opens a larger picture). As surveys go it asks the usual questions to determine just who is reading and buying their comics. You can see questions that help determine household, income, what they eat, hobbies, etc. This survey was unusual in that DC wanted it returned not long after the issue hit the stands. Participants were entered in a drawing for a chance to win some pretty good prizes. Winners are listed below the survey.


Then you get to section Q5, asking "How Interested Are You About Reading About...".

In part A the subject is environmental, with "Pollution". Part B asks about "Black People". Section D & E inquire about "National" & "City Problems", respectively. The remaining questions are what appears to me as innocuous filler, as these questions were asked in another manner elsewhere in the survey.


The survey is conspicuous in not asking about the almost equally large Asian demographic. It also ignores Hispanic, Native American and other groups. I think that one of the purposes of the survey was to asses the viability of a more aggressive pursuit in the African-American market. This may have reflected a national trend. What is presented here on the microcosmic may be what was happening in 1970 on a macro-level. As one culture or ethnic group is fully absorbed into mainstream society the remaining are marginalized. At least until the next phase is implemented. In 1970 the anti-war protest fad was in full swing, but the Asian demographic may not have been considered attractive to general society or business. I think that just because people didn't want the United States to bomb a foreign country doesn't mean they also wanted the refugees living next door.


The interesting thing about this is that truthfully, in Marvel and DC stories had been already appearing that featured characters in more "realistic" settings such as urban neighborhoods, schools, low income, etc. Some of the Iron Man issues come to mind. And lest we forget, the later Green Lantern/Green Arrow "relevancy" issues in particular.

A few months later in Action #398 the survey winners were announced. DC claims over 100,000 people participated and the list of winners is pretty respectful. If circulation was at least a million as I've heard it may have been back then, then that percentage is not a bad showing and the survey results may have closely represented the readership. The survey just may have been something other than a stunt to increase sales and could have influenced future editorial policy.

Anyone you know?

Tags: Comic Book Public Service Announcement Star Trek Race relations

Comic Book Ad: Apollo Command Module

Very cool b/w ad for Mattel's model of the Apollo Command Module from Action Comics #397, 1971.
Very cool b/w ad for Mattel's model of the Apollo Command Module from Action Comics #397, 1971.The different views of the module at the bottom of the page are an added bonus.

Tags: Comic Book Ad Space Race

alt.supergirl.mind-control

"Yes, Supergirl, OBEY ME, your master! Destroy all suggestive imagery! Today, Freud! Tomorrow..the JUNG!"

Tags: SOTI Supergirl

Letter from 'Nam

from Action Comics #382, November 1969

I am immediately skeptical of most things, which I consider a positive survival trait (my friends say I am cynical..but they have the glass-is-half-empty kind of personalities), so when I read this letter purportedly sent in on behalf of his squad from a marine serving in Viet Nam, I immediately thought of this and this.

Note the self-comparison of their mission to the Legion of Super-Heroes. They were also teen-agers out to save the world (but really, they just enforced the status quo). An unfortunate comparison. Is that real irony or Alanis Morrisette irony? I can never tell.

Given the seriousness of the soldiers' location the comic book referenced response from Editor Mort Weisinger to the 'unsolicited' missive seems a little inappropriate but was likely sincere. It also seems carefully neutral since you couldn't expect too much overt in-depth political & social commentary either pro or con in a comic book of the era...yet. That was still over the horizon a bit.

Tags: War

That's fun to say

MURDERESS--
MURDERESS!
MURDERESS!

Tags: SOTI Supergirl

Supergirl's Boyfriend Just Don't Get It

Stupid or suicidal?

Wow! If looks could kill!
Oh, wait...with her they can.

Tags: SOTI Supergirl

Supergirl's Boyfriend is a Super-Dumbass

You...IDIOT!

Tags: SOTI Supergirl

Comic Book PSA: The Good Old American Way

DC almost never passed up an opportunity to sneak a little red-baiting propoganda into a story.

from Strange Adventures #65, 1956

Tags: Comic Book PSA Propaganda

Clown Porn

I think I've seen this image on pop-ups advertising pr0n sites. The ad-copy usually contains a combination of the words action, solo and hot.

Did the artist really think this image would get in under the multiple-meaning radar?

Oh, it's a bat...no, wait...hmm...

Tags: SOTI















from DC's Arkham Asylum TPB,
by Morrison & McKean

Ennis' Hitman Returns

I've heard that Garth Ennis is going to bring back Tommy Monaghan and the gang from DC's Hitman series for a story arc somewhere soon. The rumor is that the story will be set in the past so as not to screw up the climax at the end of the Hitman series. There are a precious few comic titles that ended in such a well-produced manner that they should not be tampered with. One is Preacher and the other is Hitman. I really hope that DC doesn't screw up this opportunity.

For those of you not familiar with Hitman, it was the only good concept to come out of the ill-concieved Bloodlines crossover event that appeared in all the DC annuals some years ago. Hitman was a series that consistently delivered wit, well-written stories and always interesting art. An assassin by trade, a biological attack by an infectious alien left Tommy with X-Ray vision and the ability to read minds. This was a talent that was useful in his work and gracefully under-played by Ennis. Tommy was also the kind of rascal that would trick his way into the JLA headquarters just to use his X-Ray vision on Wonder Woman. His ensemble supporting cast was great though I did not like the character of Six-Pack. I saw him as a cleverly-concieved yet rapidly-tiresome satire of the Golden Age sidekick.

Readers new to Ennis should know that the Ennnis-verse is usually populated by reprehensible human beings and this series is no exception. But the humor of the series balanced out the personalities and situations nicely. People often refer to the issues guest-starring Superman and a novice Green Lantern as some of their favorite stories.

I myself favored the Seaquarium Undead and Catwoman issues.

Zombie baby seals.

Tommy needing to contact the morally ambiguous Catwoman led to what is possibly the single greatest image ever to appear in a comic book...

The Hitman invents...the CAT-SIGNAL!

I don't get why DC has not collected the entire series for the trade market but I recommend that you go find the Hitman run and buy it right away. You can find some of it in the trades and the rest in back issues. You won't be sorry.

Tags: Hitman

The Immortal Superman

Written by Cary Bates and drawn by Curt Swan, The Immortal Superman is a 3-part story that took place over issues 385-386 of DC's Action Comics, featuring Superman. In an arc referred to variously as The Immortal Superman and Home For Old Heroes, Superman travels 100,000 years into the future to capture a bank robber. It is amazing that the people of thousands of centuries to come had no way to see inside a locked cash vault, but were able to send a messenger-robot into the past to locate Superman, requesting help only he could provide. In fact, that was a theme over the next few issues (once again DC sneaks in the social message that everyone has something to contribute) as he saves the future societies using his primitive wits.

The twists in this story come from Superman being a victim of the Time Trapper. Not only was he unable to retun to the past, for every year he traveled forwards in time, he also aged physically. While he superficially appeared older he was still a powerful Superman, only more so thanks to future medical science and the rays from a group of heroes who each have 25 super-powers. During his trip he became invulnerable not only to kryptonite, but also mystical witch dogs from Tozz.

Superman really likes that chain busting trick doesn't he?

Since Superman is unable to go back in time he has no choice but to keep traveling forwards. Dissatisfaction with the era he was visiting plus the search for a means back home prompted him to keep going forwards.Now keep in mind this is the pre-Crisis Superman, who went around in time as a normal person walks across the street and with considerably less difficulty. Heck, even Krypto and Comet, the Super-Horse could go to the future and back on a whim. Unfortunately every succeeding era was more dissapointing and useless to him than the one before. Without Lois, Superman is really a glass-is-half-full kind of guy.

By the end of the third part of the arc he was over 1 million years old and getting pretty damn grouchy.

The aspect of an undying Superman was interesting to explore, as a young fan I always assumed he was immortal anyways. He's invulnerable. He has a super-immune system that repairs damage. His body powered by radiation from a star, he could conceivably live until the heat-death of the universe. I figured that eventually Superman would have evolved as a form of aging into a race similar to the Guardians. That would have been interesting.

During his layovers in the future, there is a scene where a depressed Superman looks up his past to see what happened to his old friends. He discovers the world finally figured out that Clark Kent was Superman. Lois married the actor who played Superman in films (that's creepy), Jimmy Olsen wrote a book (probably with a ghost writer, because Jimmy is a dumbass) and Perry White worked at the Superman museum (get a life, old man!). In another scene, Superman is exiled to an Old Hero's Home and passes time carving statues of his dead friends out of wood as his peers play biggie-sized super-checkers.

Geez, obsess much?

When giant robots want to throw the far-future dead Earth in the galactic trash-bin because it is an eye sore (I'm not kidding), Superman rebuilds it from scratch. After cleaning the planet up Superman then re-populates it with people kidnapped out of a small primitive tribe from another world (again, not kidding!). In the final part of the story Superman is suicidal, but unable to end his own life due to his invulnerability and ethics. When injured by a Luthor-created weapon that had been hunting for Superman for 1 million years he was upset when his life was saved.

...and get those para-kids off my space proto-lawn!

By this point the Time Trapper has disappeared from the story after proclaiming Superman would never be able to get home again. Apparently in classic super-villain style, after taunting Superman one last time he lost interest in keeping track of what the super-guy was doing.

Really, the Trapper would have had better results if he put Superman in a cell monitored by one sleepy, incompetent guard who sat beneath a grill that fed air to the room from unsecured 4-foot wide ventilation shafts.

After a lot of whining Superman eventually got home by going so far into the future he circled back into his own timeline, living his life over in a series of vignettes until he settled into his proper era.

The pre-CoIE Superman pretty much had the universe as a playground, an idea that the Silver Age creative teams used often. This concept was also touched upon by Alan Moore and John Byrne in his Generations series. I always enjoyed the idea that the fabric of the DCU was a thing of weak gauze as far as Kryptonians were concerned...to tear through or weave anew as they saw fit.

Tags: Superman Silver Age

Grocery Store Artifact: Night of the Living Hungry-Man

I am stunned by what an appallingly crappy and repulsive idea this promotion was. This goes right for the room-temperature IQ demographic harder than a psychic on a bereaved widow. The idea was, after entering a contest you could wear a mask to complete your 'poker face' while watching some ESPN poker match. I guess the Ad firm that pushed this promo figured the entertainment-starved welfare-receiving trailer-trash hicks would stop in-breeding and worshipping Nascar long enough to watch some cable and vicariously play cards while using the mask. Very weird and creepy. Apparently playing the state Lotto scratcher doesnt give them enough practice to maintain their cool, professional gambler casino look. More than likely the mask could come in useful in other areas...undoubtedly the traditional hick-incest would be less creepy if you can pretend you are not related by wearing it.

Taking a look at the back of the box I am left less with the impression of 'poker face' than that of 'resurrected insurance salesman'. He doesn't crave chili fries, he wants living brains! Also, I don't see how anyone other than children (or people from Kentucky) could have heads small enough to fit the mask. The eyes just don't line up (re: Kentucky). I guess this goes right with the homily 'simple toys for simple people'. Distract the kiddies long enough so you can watch the tube and take their dim minds off the fact that they are the results of what happens when cousins marry.


I chalk this promo up to another one of those frustrating injustices in life. I mean, I could think up at least 20 really stupid things everyday and I don't get paid $60k a year for it.

Note: I bought these using a 2-for-1 coupon. In conjunction with my store discount card the kid ate lunch for 2 days on less than $4. Amazingly enough, there was also a rebate coupon included. The grocery store ended up paying me a dollar for buying these.

Tags: Grocery Store Artifact Advertising