Thursday, January 25, 2007

Now with double the entendre!

Popular Teen-Agers was unusual in that the stories were not about normal or average kids who gained riches or solved robberies by luck. This Golden Age series featured over-achievers and gorgeous people all! The unattractive people, if any, were the villains, bit players or goofy sidekicks. Any comic fans with low self-esteem need not read any of the books in this title for worry they will feel inconsequential and worthless.

Try to find the hidden agendas of the creative teams in all these panels. It shouldn't be too difficult. It isn't like this book was written by someone with the subtle powers of Judd Winnick. All flouride-impregnated art is from Popular Teen-Agers #6 (January 1951)

Popular Teenagers 06_Gay Dykeman
Toni Gay is a crime solving supermodel famous enough to require a full-time bodyguard to protect her. She usually manages to ditch the poor guy long enough to get herself and her very best friend forever, struggling actor Butch Dykeman in lots of trouble.

Popular Teenagers #6 - Give me your club
Midge Martin is a famous reporter who is driven to do anything to get a story, even dress up like a furry and make out with strange men at hedonistic theme resorts. No kidding.


Popular Teenagers #6 - Heavenly Timber
Amazonion uber-babe Honey Bunn is a professional sports player. As a woman competing in a man's world she has to work twice as hard to be considered half the athlete. Honey Bunn is very strong and often beats her teammates in feats of strength and stamina, humiliating them terribly. Oddly, she shares the locker room with her male teammates. Honey is known to lament that she regrets not being soft and feminine like other girls.



Tags:

11 comments:

  1. Wow.

    Just...wow.

    It certainly was the "Golden Age...
    ...of subtext.

    ~P~
    P-TOR

    ReplyDelete
  2. Toni Gay and Butch Dykeman, mm?

    They are so due for a revival

    ReplyDelete
  3. Man, it's been way too long since I've given a girl my leopard club.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Man, I keep going back and finding I hit 'published' instead of 'draft'.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Butch Dykeman? C'mon, that's not real. Please tell me it's not real...

    ReplyDelete
  6. Heh.

    I was rereading one of my old Airboy comics which had an ad for a Mr. Monster compilation of obscure, crap comics which included this. I was hoping some enterprising blogger had stumbled across it...

    ReplyDelete
  7. A...a leopard club? Does he have to use a different club when a lion attacks him? This isn't like playing golf, man!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I just realized that the full line is "Straighten up, Dykeman!"

    That's too good.

    ReplyDelete
  9. That entire page is gold from the setting to the dialog.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Dr. Zaius said...(elsewhere)

    Wait a minute - wait a minute - struggling actor Butch Dykeman??!?!?!?! Is that for real? You didn't photoshop that in?


    I think you meant this comment for the Popular Teens post above the Rang-A-Tang one. But no, that is how they published it. Butch, Tony and everything.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Why was Tony Gay's trainer given such hairy limbs? That physical detail was usually attached to the Baddies. Real superguys shaved their bodies. Every day.

    Or am I missing some 1950s satire, here?

    ReplyDelete

Moderation enabled only because of trolling, racist, homophobic hate-mongers.